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CHLeong
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 11:19 am
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I noticed that there is this old tree, was told more than 50 years old. On the outside it looks strong and seems to provide shade for everyone. But recently, after a few heavy down pour, its branches started to snap and leaves start to drop. Instead of providing shade, it is damaging cars, providing bird’s droppings, etc. Although its roots look strong, but on closer inspection, the tree was rotting to its core. Some expert, wanted to ban it while others want to give it a chance. Reptile experts recently discovered a Long Limbless Creature living on it which is causing it to rot further. According to the experts, this Long Limbless Creature has to two poisonous fangs and a fork tongue!
In view of the danger pose to the community by this tree and its tenant, I was wondering any forumer here can tell me which department should I call to have this tree cut down?
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The Matrix
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 11:56 am
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Have Mercy .... I beg u .... spare the knife

Must tie a yellow ribbon around this old tree liao. 50 yrs old leh, got spirits living inside, cannot suka suka cut one leh. I bet sure a lot of people come to pray and ask for magical numbers.

Somemore got divine creature living inside the core. Goodness .... the creature and the tree co-exist together leh, must be protected and studied.

How about calling Sentosa IR dept since they are shifting trees. It will definitely attract more viewers than destroying the tree and mythical creature .... that's wat casino is all about isn't it.
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goldie
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 12:38 pm
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Heard somebody saw the mystical creature before.

Creature pop-eye one like pop-eye celestrial fish.

I also heard all those who pray for lucky numbers from this tree end up got their fingers burnt.

This post has been edited by goldie: Wed, 27 Jun 2007 12:45 pm
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The Matrix
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 1:43 pm
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That's exactly wat the casino resort is all about !!!

Come here pray, then go there play
There is no sin, the divine says

Hv no fear, come n stay
We'll feed u nights and days

Dun be scare, do not fray
All u need is to pay
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kitsilano
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 2:04 pm
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QUOTE(The Matrix @ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 11:56 am) *

Have Mercy .... I beg u .... spare the knife

Must tie a yellow ribbon around this old tree liao. 50 yrs old leh, got spirits living inside, cannot suka suka cut one leh. I bet sure a lot of people come to pray and ask for magical numbers.

Somemore got divine creature living inside the core. Goodness .... the creature and the tree co-exist together leh, must be protected and studied.

How about calling Sentosa IR dept since they are shifting trees. It will definitely attract more viewers than destroying the tree and mythical creature .... that's wat casino is all about isn't it.



Wandering spirits..really wondering whether this spirit wander into RG or not. Maybe yes in RG act as good spirit...can this spirit mend his way? Saddened to hear of so many scandals in the newspaper...lawyers running away with clients money. Old Age home saga...charity money also disappeared. The victims of scandals beside the victims are always the family members like wife and daughters.

JUDAS!!!
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desireless
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 2:15 pm
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With so many evil tress killing people lately, better to chop it off.










BUT! nono.gif

Do not fall for the ploy of this EVIL rotting tree, because this is exactly how it wants you to think! It likes to play victim! biggrin.gif When cutter wants to cut tree down, he will surely be stopped by naive environmentalists, brain-washed tree LOVERs, and of course those despicable Long Limbless Craps living below. The tree will want these supporters to think that the cutter wants to cut it down because he is JEALOUS (woooo... so jeeaalousss birgits_giggle.gif) that it "attracts the most attention" and "looks" strongest (from the outside) among the other "greener" trees around. Yes, the sharped-eye can see that this tree is rotting from inside. For the good of people around it, the tree has to be cut down. But the tree simply don't care. So are the brainwashed followers. It just wants to stay supported and receive all the attention it wants. sstar.gif Then it can stir, stir and stir.

Since it is going to happen, then might as welll wait for the rotted tree to fall and kill those boycotting idiots forming a human-block around it, including the those Long Limbless Creatures living below.

It narrows down to: We can only save those who wants to be saved. Those who stubbornly ignore the danger signs, news reports and the history of this rotted tree, well, good luck to them. nananana.gif
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top_view_ranchu
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 2:30 pm
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Wah......today all so England! salute.gif Let me try....

Outside look strong tree, strong tree......
Inside is rotted tree, rotted tree......
Can understand save kaki, save kaki......
Cannot then go LIM KOPI, LIM KOPI......

How? Power? happydance.gif
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CHLeong
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 3:13 pm
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Look like nobody can tell me which department to call, so I shall leave it alone. Anyway, since it is rotting, let it be and the Long Limbless Creature will move on to another tree and devour the host again. Truly a terrible pest!
Although I have a love for nature, but this Long Limbless Creature to me equate to a pest, worst then housefly or mosquitoes. I might swat at these bugs but for this Long Limbless Creature, it is better to capture it, put it in a cage and display to the whole wide world.
It is unfortunate that such a nice place, where we called Garden City, stood such terrible tree and its hidden tenant.
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desireless
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 4:47 pm
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To cut a 50yr-old plus tree, you'll have to go to National Parks Board for that.

But are you sure the slimey Long Limbless Creature is a seperate entity? If so, then you'll have to call Pest Control. I thought that it is a piece of tree's crap or maybe a tree dxxk. hysterical.gif Always thought it is a part of the tree itself to attract victims into the hole for its consumption. Wah.. scary evil tree wacko.gif
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peter porker
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 5:36 pm
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At first I thought it was some cryptic, tongue in cheek post but seems like its the real deal.

QUOTE(top_view_ranchu @ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 2:30 pm) *

Wah......today all so England! salute.gif Let me try....

Outside look strong tree, strong tree......
Inside is rotted tree, rotted tree......
Can understand save kaki, save kaki......
Cannot then go LIM KOPI, LIM KOPI......

How? Power? happydance.gif


Stick to ranchus. hysterical.gif
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CHLeong
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 9:21 pm
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I called the National Garden Board (NGB) and it goes...."Thank you for calling, for English please press one, Hua Yu Qing An Er.Press 0 for the operator .......All our operators are busy at the moment please hold....Your call is important to us and we will get back to you shortly" Then the line cut! Darn, so many rotten tree meh??!!
Finally got through, they said they will send someone to investigate but after I told them about the Long Limbless Creature (LLC), they told me to contact the Zoo! I called the Zoo but they said they do not handle pest and directed me to Ministry Of Surrounding. MOS, however said that are busy with mozzies and since it involves trees I should goes to NGB!
I got angry, feel like marching into a police station. Since I have colleague who is an ex-policeman, I consulted him but he said that the criminal law has nothing to do with trees and pest unless it is a con job! Darn, what has trees and Long Limbless Creatures got to do with con job?! Pick up the phone and I spoke to my classmate,
Me: “Can I speak to CJ Cheng?”
Sect:“Who is this calling and do you have an appointment?”
Me: “Can you convey to him this is CHLeong?”
Sect: “Hold on please”
CJ Cheng: “Halo, brother!”
Me: “Chief Justice Cheng!”
CJ Cheng: “Don’t call me like that lah, me just a lawyer”
Me: “Ah pui, basket ball have a rotten tree and LLC, called all the people involved, everybody siam, so end up calling you.”
CJ Cheng: “ Halo, please hor, this kind of thing please don’t waste my time. I charge people by time. If I have time to sit down with you even for lunch it means I got nothing else to do!”
So in the end it seems like everyone is busy, so went to the site look at the tree and try to spot LLC. Alamak waste my time lah, better go home prepare for my trip to BKK, more exciting there.
However, forumers in my absence, if you spot the Long Limbless Creature do help me to throw a few stone at it! Thank you for helping me.
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The Matrix
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 9:50 pm
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QUOTE(CHLeong @ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 3:13 pm) *

.... the Long Limbless Creature will move on to another tree and devour the host again. Truly a terrible pest!


Erh ... u still fail your test
for it is not a pest
try again with your best
from the hint of its nest

here you go in a quest
destroy the beast we detest
stick your sword, not your crest
till it falls, thou shalt not rest

Dave ... wanna power it up ?
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desireless
post Wed, 27 Jun 2007 10:56 pm
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QUOTE(top_view_ranchu @ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 2:30 pm) *

.....
How? Power? happydance.gif

That was quite a good one but listen to my masterpiece....

ahem...

(Please tune to "All I Have To Do Is Dream" by Everly Brothers)

"All I Have to Do Is To Be A Rotten Tree" by "The Rotting Strong Tree"

Tree..ee..ee..., strong strong tree...
Tree..ee..ee..., rot-ten tree...

When I sell fish,
say got tikum
If you believe me,
you are kong kum
I always tok chai tau
Still peo-ple call me
A tree...ee..ee, strong strong tree

When I feel blue
In the night
I will need you
To pick a fight
I always tok chai tau
Still peo-ple call me
A tree...ee..ee

I can show you my
setup oh so fine
Just buy me,
one kopi
Only trouble is
Gee Whiz
MY FISH-ES ARE DY-ING AWAY...

Don't tell you so
You wor-ship me
Enemies so
Jealous of me
I always tok chai tau
Still peo-ple call me
A tree...ee..ee, strong strong tree...
Tree...ee..ee...

I can show you my
setup oh so fine
Just buy me,
one kopi
Only trouble is
Gee Whiz
MY FISH-ES ARE DY-ING AWAY...

Don't tell you so
You wor-ship me
Enemy so
Jealous of me
I always tok chai tau
Still peo-ple call me
A tree..ee..ee..., strong strong tree...
Tree..ee..ee..., rot-ten tree...

====

Kiang hor? laugh.gif
sstar.gif sstar.gif sstar.gif OK, ok... thank you thank you sstar.gif sstar.gif sstar.gif
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goldie
post Thu, 28 Jun 2007 9:35 am
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Wow, I also wanna try. yes.gif

Here it goes :-

I am the mystical creature from the rotting tree,
Those who pray to me, sure mati.
You can forget about buying 4D or Jap Zhi Ki.
I have got 4 pests supporting me.
But when dangers lurks, they only look-see look-see.
When people passed by, the sure pee on me.


Hope I pass. wink.gif

This post has been edited by goldie: Thu, 28 Jun 2007 9:35 am
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top_view_ranchu
post Thu, 28 Jun 2007 11:18 am
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Power up? Not easy also die die must try! nananana.gif

Creature and tree

Creature clinch on tree, stirring his ah thee.
Whispered softly, thou art mighty.

Rotten tree sibeh silly, really feel mighty.
Go everywhere Lim kopi.

One day ah ra gi, horny cum itchi.
Free free, start to spank monkey.

Creature feel scary, packed his Lau Lan Chi.
Ji gi ku ji ki.

Tree thought he buddy, still don't know he flee.
Will cry like machiam thy thee.

Rotten tree ah rotten tree, now can do sim mi?
Stop being a cry baby, bring forth his Almighty.



Matrix, how? Can pin up? sweatingbullets.gif
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